Take It Up a Notch: Tips for Exploring Your Fetish Kinks

Everyone’s turn-ons are different. Some get off to simple touches and sweet terms of endearment, while others need more stimulation, toys, dirty talk, praise, and a bunch of other, kinkier stimuli.

 

If you're in that second group, we get that diving into what you really want can be a bit of a challenge. How do you bring it up with your partner? Can you experiment by yourself? Where do you even begin?

 

Don’t worry, we’ve got your back! Whether you know exactly what your kinks are or you’re still figuring things out, here are some tips that will help you explore all your fantasies.

 

First things first, you have to figure out what you’re into. The easiest way to do so is to read up on different kinks and see what sparks interest and what you can see yourself exploring.

 

Another good idea is to look up adult content featuring the fetishes or kinks you want to check out. Seeing is believing, after all! Just be careful—you need to find the very best porn sites out there to ensure the content you watch is ethical and gives you accurate info and representation.

 

Now, though it might seem like this step isn’t necessary if you already know what you like, that’s not the case. Think about it: you’ll need to discuss your desires, boundaries, and fantasies with a partner at some point. 

 

So, you’ll have to know what to ask for, how to start the convo, and what to expect in response. Even more importantly, you’ll have to know how to practice things safely.

Doing this kind of research will help with all of that, so don’t skip it.

 

Speaking of sharing things—if you have a partner (whether long-term or not), talking to them about your fantasies is the key to a satisfying sex life. For starters, that means openly sharing what turns you on and what you’d like them to do. Of course, it goes the other way around too, so you should be open to hearing their kinks as well.

 

Aside from simply listing what you like, it’s also crucial to set boundaries. Is there something that you (or your partner) simply isn’t willing to do? If so, you need to say it clearly and agree that it is off the table.

 

At first, these convos might be awkward, but that’s to be expected. The more you discuss it, the easier it’ll get. Plus, constant communication will also make engaging in your kinks easier, because everyone will know what to expect and there will be no embarrassment.

 

A mistake that many kink lovers make is jumping straight into the deep end right away. If they like BDSM, they’ll go for bondage immediately; if they’re into pegging, they’ll get the biggest strap-on out there and expect everything to go smoothly from the get-go.

 

The results are typically the same: a lackluster experience that makes them scared to try again. Well, we’re here to ensure that doesn’t happen to you!

 

All you have to do is start slow. Go for light roleplays and playful dominance instead of a full power exchange scenario. Use a soft ribbon in place of handcuffs, a butt plug instead of a strap and dildo, and so on.

 

This way, you’ll get to dip your toes into your kink of choice, test your limits, and have fun in the process. With time, you can take things up a notch and raise the bar to the kinkiest levels you can take.

 

Some kinks—like the aforementioned power play—come with little to no risks. But others, such as breath or impact play, can cause serious injuries and trauma if you’re not careful.

 

For that reason, it’s essential to learn everything you can about potential risks before you get down to business. Again, it’s also important to talk these things through with your partner, so you both know what to expect.

 

This is where watching pros do it can come in handy once more. Fetish porn actors are trained to do things safely, so finding quality videos and learning from them is a great case for this reason as well.

 

Aside from porn, you can also take advantage of erotic stories, kink workshops, articles, and anything else you can find. As long as the content you pick is reliable and based on reality, it can help you get the hang of things.

 

Last but not least—give yourself full permission to enjoy your kinks to the fullest. We still live in a world that shames anyone who doesn’t like vanilla sex alone, but that shouldn’t deter you in the slightest.

 

Find someone whose desires are similar or at least compatible with yours, and let yourself have fun. As long as everything you try is consensual and safe, there’s nothing to be ashamed about!

 

There you have it—exploring your kinks is easy with a checklist like this. Remember to do your research, communicate, and be safe at all times. Even more importantly—enjoy yourself and embrace your kinky side to the fullest!